"Take heart; get up, he is calling you." So throwing off his cloak, he sprang up and came to Jesus. Then Jesus said to him, "What do you want me to do for you?" The blind man said to him, "My teacher, let me see again."
-Mark 10:49-51

I'm sure you can guess the end of the story. Jesus is moved, and tells the man that his faith has made him well. Immediately, Mark tells us, the man regains his sight, and follows Jesus on the way. It's a nice ending, or a nice new beginning, however you look at it.

I have read this story many times, and I always notice something different. Sometimes I notice the quickness of the healing - immediately, Mark says - and wonder why more healings aren't so fast, why there aren't more happy endings. Sometimes I notice that Jesus says it's his faith that has made him well, and I wonder how this man came by such a faith, and how mine measures up. But this morning, as I read this story, I notice something else.

What catches my attention at the moment, I notice the man's honesty, I notice his eagerness to go tell Jesus just exactly what he wants. I wonder if the man felt self-conscious at all. Did he ask himself: should I ask for this? What will Jesus think? Will this work? Did he have all kinds of doubts, but decide to ask anyway? Or did he never stop to ask such questions?

In a sense, it probably doesn't matter. I mean, I don't think there's some formula to healing. We can't figure out how to be just like this guy so that our prayers for healing (or whatever) will be just as effective as his. I don't think that's the point at all.

I ask those questions not because I think there's some formula we can learn, but because it makes me wonder about my own faith.

Am I honest in my own prayers? Do I feel self-conscious in the things I pray for? Do I trust that my prayers make a difference? The answer to all those questions is sometimes. Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

But as I ponder all of that - how the blind man approached Jesus, how I approach Jesus, I remember that, in the end, it's more about Jesus than the blind man or me. What I mean is that, when all is said and done, the blind man didn't need to worry about whether his faith was enough, and neither do I. Neither do you. It's enough that God loves us.

It's good to ponder our faith, our prayer life. But none of that is what makes us possible for us to know God. God's grace is enough, for each of us.